'Wonder Woman' labored tirelessly to assist others

By Yamil Berard

yberard@star-telegram.com

FORT WORTH -- After Robin Maness Thayer dressed as Wonder Woman for a party in the 1980s, the nickname stuck, and not only because she was 6 feet tall and had striking eyes and screen-siren hair.

Mrs. Thayer was a super hero because of her tireless energy on behalf of the community, family and friends said Monday.

"Hey, Wonder Woman, get out your magic rope" was among the messages on Mrs. Thayer's Facebook page after she learned last year that she had liver cancer.

"She just loved helping people, and she did it with so much joy," said professional golfer Angela Stanford, who coached Mrs. Thayer's daughter at Trinity Valley School.

Mrs. Thayer, 52, a member of the first TCU women's basketball team, died Sept. 20. Her funeral was Saturday.

She was born July 8, 1958, in Inglewood, Calif., to the late Robert and Margaret Maness. She graduated from Bedford Junior High School, L.D. Bell High School and Texas Christian University.

She met Mike Thayer, who is 6-foot-6, when he was playing with the Fort Worth Rugby Club. After two weeks of dating, the couple became engaged in 1983, although she had been dating another rugby player. "When you know, you know," he said.

It was typical, he said, for her to organize fundraisers for the needy. When their children attended Tanglewood Elementary School, for example, she organized a blood drive for a crossing guard with sickle-cell disease. That blood drive continues today, family and friends said.

Mrs. Thayer was a tireless band booster at Paschal High School and Trinity Valley School, and served on the board of the Angela Stanford Foundation.

One year for the city's Parade of Lights, she personally outfitted the entire Paschal band with purple Santa hats and decorative glow lights for each instrument.

"She was so generous with her time and with other people," said childhood friend Tracy Sterling Bristol. "She was gregarious and friendly. Even if you were meeting Robin for lunch, she'd never be alone. She always had with her an entourage of people."

Phyllis Kwedar, another friend, said Mrs. Thayer was a role model for her children. In letters, Kwedar's children, now in their late 20s, described Mrs. Thayer as "a woman who had been a rock" to them.

The Thayer family suggests memorial donations to the Angela Stanford Foundation, Box 1006, Fort Worth, TX 76114.

Other survivors include a daughter, Elizabeth Thayer; a son, Max Thayer; and a sister, Becky Oder.

Read more: http://www.star-telegram.com/2010/09/27/2499162/robin-maness-thayer-52-labored.html#ixzz10poRZNM7

Flight 921

Robin passed peacefully Monday morning, September 20 at the exact time her Pop took off.

A celebration of her life will be held Saturday, September 25 at 3 p.m. at All Saints Episcopal in Fort Worth, followed by an informal gathering at one of her favorite places, Angelo's barbeque.

Her love and laughter will always be with us.

A change bringing comfort and peace

Dear sweet friends and supporters,

This morning a scan revealed that the chemo has not been working. This afternoon, Robin was moved to a quiet, spacious room on the hospice floor of Baylor All-Saints. She is resting comfortably with the family nearby. She is receiving meds for pain management.

Because of the medication, she is sedated most of the time but has enjoyed some limited visitation, for which the family is very grateful. Please continue to keep Robin in your thoughts and prayers.

Back to ICU

Last week mom was moved down to ICU because of problems with low blood pressure. After a few days she was moved out thanks to a higher more stable b.p. and back to her recovery floor. She was actually neighbors, with an old friend Alex Williams. Mr. Williams was our security guard at the elementary school, Tanglewood, my brother and I attended. Mr. Williams is battling sickle cell. While at Tanglewood my mom started the annual blood drive, which still continues today, for Mr. Williams a man who we greatly love and cherish. It was so strange that they were both there together in the hospital at the same time. Today my mom will be moved back down to ICU. Her blood pressure has dropped again. She is extremely weak and unable to move from her bed. Since she is neutropenic (I think that's how it is spelled?) she is unable to have flowers or any fresh fruit. Right now jello is the only thing she will eat. Since she has to move and get readjusted to her new environment, visitors will be limited. She is so exhausted and goes in and out of sleep, so she is not really up for visitors. However, my aunt and I have been reading my mom the lovely cards that everyone has sent. It is definitely helping my mom and our spirits, so please keep them coming! We do not feel defeated at all, but we are trying to stay as strong as possible for mom. Stress and emotion has definitely been getting the best of us! We do apologize for not returning phone calls, texts, and emails, but there is just not enough time in the day! As the week goes on and we find out more information we will try to update you all. Thank you so much for you love and support!

Our Path to Fighting Cancer

Dear wonderful friends and family,

Your prayers and good wishes mean so much to us. Please know we are doing everything we can for my mom. There are many unknowns with cancer, and many paths and choices to be made as this unfortunate journey unfolds.

We have heard many kind suggestions for various doctors and treatment centers, but early on, it was my mother's wish to stay in Fort Worth to be close to home—and it is just not possible for her to travel even if she wished otherwise. We have complete confidence in the doctors we have chosen who are treating the very uncommon type of cancer my mom has. Dr Dewar and Dr Senter have been helpful with their guidance and we are so lucky to live where there are so many resources available to us, so close to home, and to you all. Dr. Dewar and Dr. Senter both have children who grew up with my brother and I. They both care very greatly for our families and if they knew that we should be somewhere else then they would say so and send us on. Of course we want to explore every possible avenue for my mom, so please try be understanding and respectful that we feel confident in the treatment plan and medical team she has chosen for her fight. Also, every patient is unique and some hospitals can treat some better than others, with the cancer that my mom has, she is in the right place for right now.Although I understand that people give their suggestions because of their concern and everything is said with the best intentions, but it is very disheartening when we continually receive messages that make us feel like we are not doing our best to find the best treatment for my mom. My mom is my hero, why would I not want the best for her? Please be respectful of this, I know we are all very stressed right now and very worried, however the less stress my family and I have the better.

There are no easy answers here, and a great deal of frustration as we all wait and see what to do next. We will try to keep everyone informed as we see how Robin's body reacts to the chemo. I have also heard wishes for me to be more specific of the treatment of my mother on the blog. However it seems that numbers and conditions change daily. As busy as I am, it is difficult enough to update once a week. Also, my mother gives me ideas of what she wants me to write on the blog. She does not want specifics written because she does not wish to cause any worry or additional stress. If my mother had it her way completely she would have loved to conceal the fact that she had cancer.


Keep praying -- we love you guys and treasure your support!

Go Frogs.

Chemo Round Two.

I apologize for the wait time in between posts! Last Monday mom had her second round of chemotherapy. Yesterday she had her check up with the oncologist who made the decision to admit her once again into the hospital. This is going to be pretty routine after every chemo therapy from now on. It provides the opportunity to regain an immune system, get her numbers back up, and try to keep her rested so she can gain her strength back. Last night was her first night in the hospital since the second round, however today she is doing much better since the two transfusions she had last night. Her labs were looking pretty good today and we are thinking that she will not have to be in the hospital as long as she did the last time (which was about 10 days). Hopefully this time it will just be a few days to get her numbers back up and strength to return home. Visitors are to be limited for the first few days just as a precaution from illness and also to try to keep her rested, she is very weak right now and needs as much peace and quiet as possible. We cannot thank everyone enough for the gift cards that were dropped off the past few weeks. So far those have worked out great and it is nice for mom to have so many choices! Thank you so much! As we continue to battle with this cancer we feel so thankful to have such wonderful people in our lives who constantly support and pray for us. We are so lucky.

Meals

After about a week at home mom has been doing well. Now that she is able to sleep in her own bed she is getting a bit more rest. We are very thankful that so many have reached out and offered to bring us meals. However mom is very sensitive to some smells and it can definitely ruin her appetite so our good friend Kelly Foster came up with the wonderful idea of gift cards! It would be great if mom could have a few choices to decide where she would like food from. If you would like to bring by a small gift card rather than a meal it would definitely help us out a lot! Here are a few restaurants that my mother so far has enjoyed food from: Charlestons, Szechuan, Central Market, Yogis, Jason's Deli, Smoothie King (they make a smoothie especially for cancer patients called "The Hulk"), and prayers would help also!

Chemo is kickin' Robin

Sorry it has taken so long to update! We have been very busy! Mom has been in the hospital for about a week now. She had an appointment with her oncologist who told us that her numbers were pretty low and that it would be best for her to be in the hospital. She doesn't really have much of an immune system and has had several blood transfusions. Right now her numbers have been pretty inconsistent; some go up and some go down. So, she will most likely be in the hospital until we can get those numbers up. Once everything is stable and ready to go she will wait a week until she has her next chemotherapy treatment. She is trying to get rest but it is very difficult to do in the hospital! As far as her nutrition goes she is eating a little bit more everyday, it is baby steps but she is moving forward so that is good! The doctor did feel the tumor and said he thought that it felt smaller so we were pretty excited about that! Since her immune system isn't very strong, visitors are very restricted. She is at Baylor downtown if anyone would like to send cards or something to make my mom smile! Max left for Oklahoma State on Monday, so my aunt, father and I have been taking shifts up to the hospital. We are all pretty exhausted but keep on kickin', we are on a mission to kick some cancer booty! Please continue with your prayers and thoughts we cannot have enough of them! Love to all!
-Elizabeth

All Wigged Out

Tuesday's wig shopping was comical and new. There were some interesting choices, mom chose not to go with the beehive Blondie, or the 70's keepin it alive look, but rather a classic, brunette "Robin" do. She also had her first doctor's appointment since chemo and we found out that there are No restrictions to what she can and cannot have. Also, found out that she can have flowers in the house. She was told to consume about 3000 calories a day and that is quite a challenge for her, since she has lost her appetite. Thanks to Mrs. Brownlie and Mrs. Brannon for the meals this week! Mom said the few bites she had were amazing and that she wished she could eat more....The chemo has definitely changed her appetite and the way food tastes. Has gone out for a few lunches, but of course some days she feels better than others. The chemo side effects are definitely kicking in! This weekend the Selkirk residence will be just us girls as my dad is helping my brother move into his new house in Stillwater....We(my aunt and I) will be watching girly movies, while my mom while will be watching sports... Not much of a girls weekend but we'll try! I still have not been able to create the care calender for the dinner schedule...Thanks for you patience! Also we really appreciate the short but sweet visitors that came over to the house this week! As always keep those prayers and positive thoughts coming! We love you all so much!! I do not know how we could survive this without all of our wonderful friends and family!!!and how bout those Rangers!!!
-Elizabeth

Out for Lunch

Mom is home and feeling ok! The chemo is taking a toll and therefore she is not sleeping too much. However, we did get out today to have lunch with some friends and it was great! Soon I will be putting up a list of what mom can and cannot have. For now she definitely cannot have flowers in the house or any fresh fruit, everything must be cooked. We will hopefully be setting up a care calender online to organize who is bringing food, what they are bringing, etc. We are very busy, but I will be working on that so that people can bring by food! I put up some pictures today of our journey so far! There are no words to describe how thankful we are for having such wonderful people like you in our lives. Your support and prayers have been uplifting and we appreciate it so much! Love to you all and thank you for being so patient with me while I try to get everything organized! This week I will put up the list of what mom is allowed to have and hopefully get that care calender rolling!

My mom wears something from Victoria Secret??

Mom is still in the hospital...but it is a good thing! The antibiotic iv has been great and they decided to keep her in the hospital for a while to monitor her and to keep her in a stable environment. Tomorrow she will have her first chemo session to begin shrinking the quickly growing tumor that is in the liver. However other than that there is nothing new...We still do not have a primary source and we are also still waiting on results to find out if the other cysts are cancerous.... However her spirits are up and she is definitely the most stylish in the hospital right now with her cute as can be Victoria Secret "boyfriend" pants (thank you Mrs. Dewar)!!! I never thought I would say this but my mom is looking good in Victoria Secret's! I have heard rumors about people wanting to bring us food...However we are good for now with Chef Max in the house, he is keeping us well fed!! I am working on posting pictures so keep an eye out for that... As far as visitors, you are welcome to come up, but call my dad before coming up to make sure it is a good time!! Again, thank you and love to all for the prayers and positive thoughts! Please keep them coming!
-Elizabeth

Flight Status

Sorry this has taken so long for me to post! We have been very busy!!!
As most everyone knows, mom was diagnosed with adenocarcinoma of the liver with unknown primary site of origin. This was discovered when she had her gall bladder removed a few weeks ago(thank goodness). She has had three scans and still no primary site has been discovered. She is currently in the hospital for IV antibiotic therapy because she has had a fever of unknown origin ever since the surgery....is my nickname "ET because of my initials or is my family of unknown origin!!!She is very tired but spirits are up and she is ready to start chemo! She will be having a PET scan sometime in the near future to find out if there is cancer elsewhere and she should be out of the hospital this weekend! We greatly appreciate the thoughts and prayers!Now that the blog is up and since my mom is in the hospital right now please try to contact my brother, dad, aunt or myself so we can get my mom to rest! This is going to be a long flight and so far the turbulence has made my mom feel ill but she is NOT I repeat NOT cleared for take off! Love to all! -Elizabeth "e.t."